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Cara Delevingne was sincere about how to come to terms with her sexuality.
The 28-year-old model and actress admitted that, as she grew up in “an old-fashioned home”, it took her some time to understand what it meant to be gay. “I didn’t know anyone who was gay,” Delevingne admitted during a new episode of Goop podcast with Gwyneth Paltrow.
“I didn’t know it was a thing and, in fact, I think that, as I grew up, I didn’t know it was homophobic,” she added.
At the time, Delevingne said that “the idea of being [with] same sex [partners]”left her feeling” disgusted “.
“I was like, ‘Oh my God, I would never do that, this is disgusting, ugh.'”
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Delevingne says the internal struggle with her sexuality has affected her mental health.
“I correlate massive depression and suicidal moments in my life [to that] because I was so ashamed to be that. But in fact, this is the part of me that I love and accept so much, “said the star.
RELATED: Cara Delevingne Talks About Being Pansexual: ‘I Fall In Love With The Person
THE Carnival Row the actress, who has since turned out to be pansexual, described her sexuality as “constantly changing”. But she admits that the doubt still arises from time to time. “There is still a part of me that I think, ‘Oh, I would like to be straight.’ There is still that side. It’s really complicated, “said Delevingne.
Now, she feels happier when she doesn’t have to conform to a single gender norm. “I feel much more comfortable in fluidity than it is to be just a human and to be an animal, almost, because that is what we are,” said Delevingne. “To trust your own instincts.”
Delevingne spoke earlier about her experience in revealing herself to her family in an interview with Variety. “Once I was able to speak freely about my sexuality, I was no longer hiding anything”, the Paper cities Star said, recalling her fear of revealing that she was attracted to women for her father after a heartbreak.
“Honestly, I was terrified,” she said, adding that she thought he might throw her out of the house. But she found acceptance. She explained, “He was like, ‘You deserve to be loved.’ He was so sweet, I could cry about it now. “
If you or someone you know needs help with mental health, send “STRENGTH” to the Crisis Text Line at 741-741 to be connected to a certified crisis counselor.
If you or someone you know is considering suicide, contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255), send “STRENGTH” to the Crisis Text Line at 741-741 or go to suicidepreventionlifeline.org.