COLOMBIA – Someone is in the back corner of the clubhouse, leaning over a full copy of Webster’s and writing a list. Players take the list to the post-game press conference, where they happily put the words in their answers.
“Omnipresent.” “Slobberknocker.” “Ridiculous.” “Petite.”
“The ball looked very flappy and I gave it a good swing and made good contact,” South Carolina defender Andrew Eyster said of his winning streak that ended the series of rivalry over Clemson on February 28.
“Flumptuous”, basically meaning happy and fat, made writers look for their own dictionaries while Eyster smiled and his companions laughed off camera. If Gamecocks are winning because they are having fun or having fun because they are winning, does it really make a difference?
Not even a little.
Not after the joy and enthusiasm seemed to have been sucked out of the program in the past eight years. Not even after each time that the Gamecocks seemed ready to regain their place in the baseball universe, did the rock slip and chase it down the hill to start rolling it again to the top.
There were only six games, but No. 13 Gamecocks won them all. And the way they are throwing five-dollar words into the media and carrying a plastic battle ax and sickle to the reserve bank with them at each game, people are starting to get nostalgic. This is the same program that awarded a national championship to a fungus club with a baseball glued to it, and also the one that credited a pet fish for a winning streak two years later.
The ax that Eyster was waving on February 28 after his second hit-off in a few days has a backstory. He and the scythe were loaned by hitter Brady Allen and national home run leader Wes Clarke.
“In fact, this is my nickname. My friends call me ‘Soul Reaper’, ”said Allen. “Wes is ‘2 Soulz’ or ‘2 Glockz’, one or the other. This was actually our Halloween costume. “
The two decided to bring the props along with the bats, and whoever hits the home run gets the ax or the scythe. Clarke, who beat two against Clemson to push his season total to eight, held them tight.
Allen also explained that the team lives and dies for … well, the phrase he used could not be understood and did not appear in a Google search, despite the numerous spellings. Make sure it is not taught in the English language.
First pitcher Will Sanders, who won every victory in the two-game series against the Tigers, took the microphone and made it almost impossible for anyone to follow.
“Today, listening to Miley Cyrus, a little bit of ‘Hoedown Throwdown’, was great to make me completely nervous and ready to have fun,” said Sanders. “Also, Miley Cyrus helps with the translucency of the ball, so it’s great.”
“Translucency”, meaning a physical property that allows light to pass through? On a baseball?
“Yes,” he said seriously, although he admitted that one can be part of the act, “but also one of my favorite words.”
The fun has a chance to continue on March 2 at Rock Hill, when the Gamecocks travel to face Winthrop in the return game from a two-game set (the Eagles lost 12-4 in Columbia last week). The ax and sickle are packed, along with the dictionary.
It may be a case of conviviality.
Follow David Cloninger on Twitter @DCPandC.