One of the few investigations that found no age-related differences in well-being, posted last year, was focused on 226 young and older adults living in the Bronx. In this neighborhood, the poorest neighborhood in New York, older people tend to live with their children and grandchildren, helping with meals, collecting school, looking after children, in fact acting as co-parents. No “age increase” in emotional well-being for them, the researchers found, in part, they concluded, because “the sample was a little ‘more stressed’ than average levels across the country.”
Even with this crucial distinction noted, these studies support a theory of emotional development and aging formulated by Dr. Carstensen that psychologists have been debating for years. This view holds that when people are young, their goals and motivations are focused on acquiring skills and taking risks, in order to prepare for the opportunities that the future may bring. You can’t know if you will be good at running a business, or on stage, unless you give it a real chance. Doing heavy work for little money; tolerating horrible bosses, bad owners, needy friends: the young adult’s mental obstacle course is no less stressful because it is so predictable.
After middle age, people become more aware of the narrowing of the time horizon and, consciously or not, begin to gravitate towards daily activities that are more intrinsically enjoyable than self-improvement.
They are more likely to skip the neighborhood meeting for a walk from the neighborhood to their favorite local bar or bank with a friend. They accepted that the business plan did not work, that his paintings were more suitable for an office than for a gallery. They have come to accept themselves for what they are, instead of what they should become. Even those who lost their jobs in this tragic year and face the prospect of re-entering the job market – at least they know their skills and what work is possible.
It is important to keep these differences in mind in the near future, if only to reduce the increasing generational divide, experts say. A pandemic that started by killing the elderly disproportionately also turned against young people, robbing them of their normal school days, graduations, sports, first jobs or any real social life – and shaming them, often publicly, if they tried to have one. Now, in a declining economy, they are at the end of the vaccine line.
“I think the older generation now, however much they were threatened by Covid, is starting to say, ‘My life is not as disturbed as that of my children or grandchildren,'” said Charles, “and this is where our focus is. in mental well-being must now change. “