Tommy and Maryanne Pilling exceeded expectations. Both had Down syndrome and when Tommy and Maryanne fell in love almost three decades ago, many doubted they would be able to make it work. These critics were wrong and the two had a happy marriage for 25 years.
In recent years, however, they faced challenges when Tommy was diagnosed with dementia and, in December, he tested positive for COVID-19. His family announced that Tommy, 62, died on January 1 of coronavirus-related complications.
“Our handsome Tommy passed away peacefully … after a battle with envious pneumonia,” wrote sister-in-law Lindi Newman on the couple’s Facebook page. “Thank you for showing me what unconditional love was, I will remember your beautiful ways forever, your pure heart, your love for music, Elvis, your dance. Your positive attitude and how you enjoyed the little things. Thank you for making Maryanne so happy. “
When the two met in the 1990s, Maryanne’s family fully supported the relationship. When Tommy was ready to propose, he planned to use a plastic ring from a vending machine. Although Maryanne’s mother, Linda Martin, refused and took him to a jewelry store to choose an appropriate ring. When he asked the question, Maryanne “jumped for joy” and started planning a wedding for 250 people. At the time, few people with Down syndrome were getting married, as many did not believe that people with Down syndrome should be allowed to do so.
“My mom has supported me 100%,” said Newman, Maryanne’s sister, TODAY in 2017. “Anyone should have the right to marry the love of his life, without prejudice or discrimination.”
Tommy and Maryanne thrived in their married life. The two matched each other well. Maryanne loves to chat while Tommy was reserved and happy to hear what his wife had to say.
“He sits and listens, and she likes it,” explained Newman three years ago. “What keeps your marriage so strong is that there is never a hidden agenda. They love each other with all their heart and are honest with each other ”.
The couple lived in their own apartment next to Maryanne’s mother and across from Newman’s in Southend-on-Sea, England. Maryanne worked one day a week at a local charity store, but spent the rest of the time with Tommy. They both loved bowling, golfing, watching movies, visiting theme parks, dining and drinking, and spending time with family. They even started venturing out into the kitchen. Newman believes that other people can learn from Tommy and Maryanne’s relationship.
“Everything is possible with love and there should be no limitations for anyone, no matter what their circumstances,” she said TODAY in 2017.
While the family tried to protect the couple from COVID-19, Tommy fell ill and was hospitalized on December 10. The family said he contracted the coronavirus. Even so, they are grateful for all the care they received at the hospital and throughout their lives.
Maryanne, who started living with her mother when Tommy was ill, knew that her husband was ill. Martin also shared his ideas on the couple’s Facebook page.
“Our dear man, Tommy, has left a huge hole in our lives that no one will ever fill. I considered him my son, although he was my son-in-law, ”she shared. “I have never regretted a single moment of the 30 years that he was in my life and affection, (he) brought so much joy just for being him, I will always be grateful for the laughter and fun he brought to our lives.