Plenty of caution

Plenty of caution

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On Wednesday, the NHL had two fun ads.

The first announcement was that Minnesota Wild was shut down for a week due to an outbreak of COVID, joining five other teams that have increased their list of repeat offenders on COVID.

The second announcement was that Nashville predators are super excited to welcome fans back to the arena this month.

If you’re feeling the dissonance there, get ready for the next part.

On Thursday morning, Elliotte Friedman announced some changes that the NHL is making to the logistics of the arena “in an effort to slow the spread of the virus”:

  • Glass removal behind team benches
  • Keep players and coaches away from the arena until 1:45 before placing the puck
  • Add space between the locker room stalls to get six feet between players
  • “Consider” (!) “Ask” (!!) teams to use HEPA air filters behind the seats

That’s it. Three small changes that will be ineffective, in addition to consideration of possibly Asking teams to maybe do something.

These changes may cause a partial slowdown in the spread of the disease, but it is clear that it does not matter. This is hockey. This is the sport of screaming and spitting.

Above all, it is the sport of hugging.




Screenshots courtesy of NBC Sports Washington

So it’s just theater.

We currently know of outbreaks in Buffalo, Chicago, Minnesota, New Jersey and Washington. Colorado, Dallas, Detroit, LA, Pittsburgh, Vegas and Winnipeg experienced recent outbreaks or at least lost players to the list of COVID-related absences. Ninety players are on the list. Twenty-two games have been postponed. And at least one player is experiencing a major career setback due to COVID.

Also on Wednesday, the NWHL, which had limited travel and fewer players, had to cancel its season / tournament because of outbreaks of COVID.

Anyone who thinks this is working is not paying attention.

Meantime,

But we are still going to do that because the final result of the league requires it. Players will not make another bubble and the owners will have to make that profit. Outbreaks and illnesses and deaths resulting from tangential people, which we will not learn about for months or years, are just the costs of doing business now. The disease is four times more prevalent than when teams entered the bubble last summer. Now there is no bubble, more viruses and more travel.

So the guys go out on the ice and do their plank battles and punch themselves in the helmet and shout at each other in the face, and then they spit again from a bench that improved the airflow a little bit or hyperventilated in a locker room where they are slightly more distant.

For the record, I’m also an accomplice to that. I’m watching games, writing stories and selling things related to hockey. And you’re reading me, which is a strange choice of yours, but you’re reading.

Still, I’m stuck with this hypothesis: what would it really take for the NHL to stop it? Did half of the teams have an outbreak? Does the list of absences reach triple digits? Does anyone die?

(Someone is going to die. Someone probably died already, but he was an elderly family member of some support team, and we cannot be sure that they fell ill because of league activities, and that gives us all sufficient degrees of separation not to feel guilty about it.)

I don’t know what to do with all this dread. I just know that the next time I see someone saying that they are doing something because of “excessive caution”, I’m calling it bullshit.

Bullshit.

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