It was not the easiest time for Kelly machine gun.
On January 18, the 30-year-old artist accessed Instagram Stories to share a message with his followers.
“I just want to tell my fans that I’ve been in, like, some kind of personally fucked place for a few months in my head,” he said. “So, I haven’t been that active on social media.”
However, Kelly shared some good news about her musical film Downfalls High, which debuted on Facebook on January 15th.
“I just got a call from the record company about Downfall Highs. In the opening weekend, we had 12 million views on Facebook, man, “he said, then correcting himself and saying that it was actually 16 million.” I’m, like, traveling.
Kelly also promoted the musical’s debut on YouTube and thanked her followers for watching the Tickets for my fallinspired film, writing, “Thanks to everyone who helped us to transform the album into its own world and era.”
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Kelly did not elaborate on this difficult time. But over the weekend, he tweeted, “Anxiety is eating me alive.” Again, he did not share details.
Kelly was always open with her fans about the challenges she faced in life. For example, during a recent conversation with Dave Franco for Interview, he talked about his past abuse of Adderall and his relationship with his father, who passed away in July 2020.
“I came from an extremely religious and extremely strict father and he wouldn’t let me hold my pen the way I wanted to,” he said at one point during the interview, which was published in November. “It completely rebelled me and completely cut off communication, because I didn’t want to have any common ground with him. I don’t want to have that with my daughter. Honesty is the key to this relationship. But also, as I grow up, the same person that I was at 25 is no longer who I am now. Currently, my drug of choice is happiness and a commitment to art, rather than a commitment to an addiction that I believed made art. “
Kelly also noted that he was beginning to take steps to cure it, including his first therapy session last week.
“This is the first time that I say, ‘Hey, I need to separate these two people,’ which is Machine Gun Kelly and Colson Baker,” he said at the time. “The dichotomy is very intense for me.”
And although he said he was still “at the beginning of the process”, he noted that he found the tools he received useful.
“I’m still pulling my hair out,” he said to Franco. “Why am I not changing overnight? How can I meditate for 10 minutes when I can’t even sit in my own brain for two minutes without being distracted by doing something? This is very difficult. But the commitment to change is inspiring, and I think that will reverberate throughout the universe and definitely for my family. I can already see that with the people around me. The willingness to finally be happy with myself attracted a much more vibrant energy around us than before. “
He also gave credit to fellow musician Travis Barker and Megan Fox, the latter with whom he fell in love after meeting on the set of his film Midnight on the Switchgrass, offering support. As he commented on the actress, “Obviously, what I’m sure is the same with you in your relationship, when you have a partner, mine being Megan [Fox], sitting there with you on those dark nights when you are sweating and not being able to find out why you are so crazy, to help you get out of your head and put it in perspective, it really helps. “