There are two Kelly Marie Trans in this story.
One is self-confident, confident and eager to show young Asian American girls that, yes, women who do not have long blond hair, big doe eyes and porcelain skin can get important roles in the films.
The other is a distant, though prominent, memory.
When Tran wrote a scathing essay in The New York Times in August 2018 criticizing a culture that marginalized her by the color of her skin, she just deleted her Instagram posts amid the online harassment of “Star Wars” fans. Her performance as Rose Tico, the first main character in a “Star Wars” film played by a black woman, was a proud moment for her. But then, she wrote, she started to believe the racist and sexist comments from online trolls. “His words reinforced a narrative that I have heard all my life,” wrote the Vietnamese-American actress. “That I was ‘another’, that I didn’t belong, that I wasn’t good enough, simply because I wasn’t like them.”
But recent box office hits like “Crazy Rich Asians” and critical hits like “Minari”, which focused on Asian characters, illuminated his view of the film industry – and contributed to his own strengthening. “I’m finally asking for the things I want and learning to trust my own opinion,” she said in a Los Angeles video interview last month. “And I wish so much that I grew up in a world that taught me how to do it at a younger age.”
Tran plays the lead role of warrior princess Raya (which rhymes with Maya) in the animated film “Raya and the Last Dragon”, released on March 5 by Disney +. This makes her the first Southeast Asian descendant actress to play a leading role in a Disney animated film, a milestone she does not take lightly. “I feel an enormous sense of responsibility,” she said. “To be honest, I haven’t slept in, like, two weeks.”
In a conversation, Tran discussed how the “Star Wars” films prepared her for the pressure that comes from being a Disney princess, the boom in Asian and Asian American stories on the screen and the pros and cons of life without social media. These are edited excerpts from the conversation.
Do you intentionally aim for roles that break barriers?
I wish! I never thought of a million years that I would do what I am doing now. I was the first black woman to have a lead role in a “Star Wars” film; I am the first Disney princess of Southeast Asia – these are things that no one who looked like me had ever done before.
In your New York Times essay, you talked about the harassment you experienced after your role in “Star Wars: The Last Jedi”. Given the recent list of successful Asian and Asian American films, does it seem that things have changed in Hollywood?
I’m so [expletive] I am excited that more films like “Crazy Rich Asians”, “Parasite” and “Minari” are being made. I am very proud to be a part of this change in terms of making films that honor people from these parts of the world. But there have also been a lot of anti-Asian hate crimes recently, so there is still a lot of work to be done.
Would you still have done “Star Wars” knowing the harassment you would face?
[Long pause] I think I would have done it anyway. Making that first movie was so much fun – it was like being admitted to Hogwarts. It was like, “This is impossible,” and so I was doing it. I really don’t look back with so much regret. “Star Wars” seems like I fell in love the first time, and then we had a really bad break up, and then I learned to love again, and now I’m in a better relationship with “Raya”. I’ve changed, and it’s great.
How are you a different person than you were three years ago?
I was so scared and put a lot of pressure on myself starting. You feel you have to do it the right way or no one else will have the chance. But I am a much stronger person now and I have the tools to react to those situations when they happen. I’m not afraid anymore. I’m finally making room for myself and asking for the things I want. God, I would like to know how to do this 10 years ago!
What are some of the things you feel comfortable asking for now?
I’ve been talking very, very loudly about the projects I do and I don’t want to get involved. I never want to promote a stereotype or accept a job that makes me feel like I’m perpetuating some kind of idea about what it’s like to be Asian. And I have been very, very adamant about my limits. Leaving social media was very healthy for me, although I was repeatedly told, “Kelly, you are not going to get brand sponsorships.” I just don’t care, because I know what is best for me and I know that I am happier than ever before.
What is most encouraging to you in the entertainment industry at the moment?
I am most inspired by the people who continue to fight for their voices to be heard, and not just in the Asian community, but in the black, trans, LGBTQ and other underrepresented communities. In my dark days, when I feel sad and insecure with myself, these are the programs I watch and the stories I turn to. It gives me a lot of hope that people are speaking their truths and really listening.
Are microaggressions something you still find?
I haven’t recently experienced outside racism the way I did when I was a child, but now I experience subtle racism in terms of people who are publicly allied but private accomplices. In Hollywood, there are people who externally think, “We believe that,” and then when you are really in the trenches with them, they do things that show that they are really complicit in white supremacy and power institutions that have allowed specific types of people escape unpunished from injustice continually.
His Vietnamese name is Loan. When did you start using the name Kelly?
The name on my birth certificate is Kelly. My parents, who are war refugees from Vietnam, adopted American names when they started work – my father worked at Burger King for almost 40 years, and my mother worked at a funeral home. And they gave their children American names. I didn’t realize it until I was older, but it was them protecting us so that people wouldn’t mispronounce our names. But I didn’t realize until later that it was also an erasure of the culture. It makes my heart ache to think about it.
What advice would you give to young Asian American actors?
Don’t blame yourself if someone is not educated enough to understand that there are different types of people in the world who deserve to be heard. Don’t internalize racism, don’t internalize misogyny, make room for yourself and ask for what you want, because no one else is going to make room for you.