Google made an ASMR video on how to switch to a Pixel, and it’s stressing me out

You can switch from your old phone to a new Google Pixel or you can close your eyes, breathe and then Switch carefully to a new Google Pixel. Sorry, I’m trying to force myself into the higher plane of existence that the narrator of this new Google ad-find-ASMR meditation session is in, and the edibles haven’t taken action yet.

The video above guides you through the process of putting all your data in a new Pixel, with meditative advice placed on a slide show of stunning views. It’s relaxing at first, but don’t take it too seriously. The cold vibrations eventually give way to a cutting line of existential dread that then takes the video completely into the territory of a scary meme.

What follows is a slightly edited transcript of The VergeSlack after editor Chris Welch pasted the link with the always appropriate “… what” reaction.

Me: this is really very stressful

Chaim Gartenberg: friiiiiiiiiiday

Chaim: powerful Friday brand energy

Chaim: we also owe 1000 percent tldr this

Sean O’Kane: cameron, you are right, there is something very stressful about it lol

Mitchell Clark: What is this

Sean: I’m going to want what Google is offering

Chris Welch: that’s it … God.

Me: damn … maybe …

Dan Seifert: pre-commercial big palm vibes

Dieter Bohn: WTF, THIS IS HUGE PRE ENERGY