So this is how the miserable 2020 NFC East story ends:
The Giants beat one of their two fiercest rivals, winning 23 to 19 over the hated Cowboys. Against every fiber of his being, against every grain of his blue-tinged soul, they recommended his football season to the Eagles, who, if they are not 1A on the list of the Giants’ most wanted fans, are certainly 1B.
But they needed the Eagles to defeat 1C – the Washington Football Team.
“I won’t be caught dead with an Eagles hat,” said Giants receiver Sterling Shepard, around 5 am, “but I’m going to root for them.”
And yet, who in their right mind could know that 6 and a half hours later, the Eagles – who, let’s be honest, over the years have probably inspired more tantrums in the Giants’ fans than the Cowboys and WFT put together – if they would make it even more detested, more insulted, more hated, more despised than ever.
First, losing three points in the third quarter, Eagles coach Doug Pederson avoided a field goal that tied the ball for a quarter and a goal of the four.
Then he knocked.
Not literally. But instead of watching as his intriguing young defender, Jalen Hurts, can react to playing in the fourth half of a meaningful game – meaningful for the WFT, anyway – he brought in his third straight quarterback, a teammate named Nate Sudfeld.
If you have never heard of Nate Sudfeld before, you were not alone.
For now, your name will come out of the mouth here: Nate # @ # $ & # Sudfeld.
Sudfeld did what you think Sudfeld would do. He threw a pick. He fumbled with the ball. He looked totally the non-candidate, with 26 successful career attempts. The Eagles dropped to their knees with a quarter to go. Washington won the game 20-14 and NFC East with a 7-9 record, and will host Tom Brady next week.
The giants?
Look, they had 16 weeks before this one to make sure they could finish better than 6-10. Outside of New York, there will be few tears shed for them. And see: it is not for the Eagles to make the Giants feel good about themselves. It just isn’t.
Still …
“Why the hell is God’s green land Jalen Hurts not in the game?” tweeted Darius Slayton.
Tweeted Golden Tate: “I think the Eagles hate us more than Washington.”
And Blake Martinez: “……”
It was quite strange how the Giants game itself had ended, with a soccer ball on the ground, with a season reduced to the random jumps of an oblong brown missile. Of course, that game could not end routinely, just as the season would never end routinely, this season of the Giants that looked like about five different seasons together in one.
Wayne Gallman made a splendid move, passing the first down marker, and that should have been a game, set, match, and allowed the Giants to put on their plush Eagles socks for a few hours.
Of course it was not possible. Of course, the ball slipped out of Gallman’s hands and landed on the grass, and even though it looked like Gallman had landed on the ball – dropped with his butt (OF COURSE!) – there was a particularly nervous moment when an official pointed out that it was a Giants ball and another said it was a Cowboys ball.
“I wanted to slap Wayne on the back of the neck for being so fidgety,” commented Giants safety logan Ryan, “but he got the ball back.”
“I’m sorry to have caused so much drama,” Gallman would say.
Drama?
He had no idea what kind of drama was yet to come.
When these giants were 0-5 and 1-7, they would all have offered their kingdom for a good little drama, for some drama that defined the season, as opposed to the drama of the will-to-darkness-forever-dissipate that followed them this season. Drama? After a bad start, after a sublime medium, after a few brutal brutal weeks, they were able to swallow a little more drama.
And he would tolerate the drama that would come, too, once they had settled their share of the bargain on Sunday afternoon. They dismissed the Cowboys and, although coach Joe Judge and most of the Giants players have not lived in the shadow of Damned Star for as long as some others in the organization, it made it a little bit sweeter.
“There were lots of smiles and hugs – socially distant hugs – in the locker room afterwards,” said Judge, and you have to believe that the loudest and happiest of greeters was John Mara, the Giants co-owner, who has lived and died with these Giants games -Cowboys for almost 60 years.
“We arrived today and had a significant game,” said Judge, “and the guys took care of business.”
They took care of business and then had to wait. And they probably wouldn’t have believed you if you told them how it was going to work out at the end of that wait. Because how could they? How can anyone?